| Author |
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Karatebutcher
| | Posted on Friday, January 23, 2004 - 9:01 am: | 
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What makes a good Redneck, do you have a lot of broken cars on the front dirt, has your house needed paiting since Sherman made his march to the Sea.
What is wrong having used car parts in the bedroom, and your 15 foot Christmas needs swept off the floor.
Wearing the same clothes day after day makes then fit better, and when you sleep in them it is cosy, so what if your wife use to be your cousin, she isn"t now, and all the children look alike.
Oh well, do we fit the pattern |
307
| | Posted on Friday, January 23, 2004 - 5:27 pm: |
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A good Redneck is a Ford F-150 with mud tires , A Tool Box in the back , a Pit-Bull that rides on the Tool Box with NO ROPE , Chew spit draping down the drivers side door and a shotgun rack in the rear window with a '22 hanging in it...Oh , on the rear window is a cheap sticker that says "Bad-Boy"
307 |
Crafter
| | Posted on Friday, January 23, 2004 - 12:19 pm: |
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Dont forget cleaning big game in your front yard while hanging from a tree or the A frame you use to pull engines from the vehicles around your yard. |
Cm3885
| | Posted on Friday, January 23, 2004 - 12:48 pm: |
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Does having a CB radio in your house or car 20+ years after they have gone out of style constitite a redneck? |
Rattlesnakejake
| | Posted on Friday, January 23, 2004 - 1:05 pm: |
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okay, well i usually inturopret them by if they have an echo mic. lol |
Bruce
| | Posted on Friday, January 23, 2004 - 1:45 pm: |
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Karate.....
In 1976 i was running service calls for Sears in St. Pete and had a call out to a house in Pinellas Park. Well i knew it was not going to be a good day when along side this rundown house was a 70 foot tower with stacked 5 el beams. The lady met me at the door and said the TV is over their and after i walked past a large liner in a rack there the set was....... FRIED. Well the 528.4196 seris of sears set had a power supply boards and PC runns over to the flyback and HV cage ..... they were gon MELTED BURNED OFF. In the power supply board fuse holder was a thick peace of copper wire discolored and i had little doubt as to the failure mode of this set. Sorry i told her this set is not repairable who ever shorted that fuse runned it...... I asked who's idea was it was and she told me " Well a local cb repairman on the cb set told my boyfriend he could fix it him self just short the fues and it will burn where the short is"! .....Burn it did....... |
ryan
| | Posted on Friday, January 23, 2004 - 2:24 pm: |
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you have to have an overly vicious or overly timid dog tied to one of the broken cars with a 3' chain |
Sk1
| | Posted on Friday, January 23, 2004 - 5:43 pm: |
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You forgot about the four wheeler in the bed of the F-150. |
Karatebutcher
| | Posted on Friday, January 23, 2004 - 5:57 pm: |
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I have a neibor who has a huge yard it must be at least 40 yards long and 30 yards wide, no grass just weeds up to you knees, he has a two story house that is at least 60 years old and there is hardly any paint on it, he has at least 14 cars dead ones all over the yard and three cars on each side of his house STUCK between the house and the fence just stuffed in there,
They are a very sloppy people , and drive across their property, their 18 foot christmas tree is still up in the window, and the last time I talked to him he was going to dig a large mud duck pond in the front yard for the Ducks and Geese that fly over us, REDNECK , REDNECK. |
Rattlesnakejake
| | Posted on Friday, January 23, 2004 - 6:02 pm: |
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thats me!!!!! lol!!!! |
Mr_Rf
| | Posted on Friday, January 23, 2004 - 6:58 pm: |
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307, don't forget the mud flaps with the cute girl molded into them, and the bumper sticker with the little boy taking a leak on a Chevy pickup, and the coon tail tied to the AM/FM antenna! |
Cactusjack
| | Posted on Friday, January 23, 2004 - 7:30 pm: |
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Or maybe if your mother-in-law has a spittoon on the end of her ironing board. Or if your wifes hairdo has ever been destroyed by a ceiling fan. Or (my parents did this) if you have a 27" color console tv that does not work and watch a 13" black and white tv sitting on top of it. |
Damyankee
| | Posted on Friday, January 23, 2004 - 7:49 pm: |
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307,
You forgot to mention that the truck doesn't have a tailgate. The front windshield is broken where the signpost hit it after he dropped his beer and leaned over to pick it up. The bullet hole in the passenger side door is from the inside where his gun went off before he could get it stuck out the window to shoot the doe out of season. The dog is riding on the toolbox because the bed is full of old tires & empty beer cans...
I could go on & on but this is getting pretty close to home LOL!!! |
Buck
| | Posted on Friday, January 23, 2004 - 8:21 pm: |
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Man....Talk about a reality check Honestly....If you guys had said that truck was a dodge, Id be loading the gun up and going to get my truck back. Ive had Deer hanging in my front yard, pulled motors in my front yard....Even cooked a "pig in the ground" in my front yard....Not sure if I fit the bill or not??? My wife is a diehard city girl so we go together like budweiser and pork rinds!
Buck |
Karatebutcher
| | Posted on Friday, January 23, 2004 - 8:42 pm: |
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Wnen I lived in Kentucky, and Tenn, WV, Georgia most of this was true |
Karatebutcher
| | Posted on Friday, January 23, 2004 - 8:55 pm: |
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OH MY BUCK
GOD"S LITTLE ACRE |
Karatebutcher
| | Posted on Friday, January 23, 2004 - 9:02 pm: |
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I have to admit some of my ways are Redneck, My wife is a Upper class American Indian, and I am country.
I can Mickey Mouse almost anything, and will pick anything off the ground and save it to make something.
Boy CA 346 is really quiet. |
Bruce
| | Posted on Friday, January 23, 2004 - 9:13 pm: |
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Karate
Remember my wife is 100% Kentucky hillbilly...
And proud of being from one of the 4 DNA bloodlines in the state. |
Ca346
| | Posted on Friday, January 23, 2004 - 10:14 pm: |
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KARATE:
Sorry, no RedNeck in me. I grew up in a rented house out in the country, and wanted to own a house as soon as I could when I got married (20 yrs old, she was 19). Waited 6 years to buy my first house. $13,300 and it was a 40 year loan... Still remember the payment=$133/month. Two bedroom, one bath 40 year old house in a VERY nice OLD neighborhood. If anybody left a car on the lawn in those days, you would have had the neighbors over wanting to help.... That house is probably selling for $175,000 now... |
Karatebutcher
| | Posted on Friday, January 23, 2004 - 10:22 pm: |
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CA346 sorry you aren"t a Redneck, but we will make you an honary one,
Now in your profile picture get your feet off the desk . |
Nlmadog
| | Posted on Friday, January 23, 2004 - 10:58 pm: |
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The Redneck,how about plat houses on 40x 125 foot lots with junk cars parked everywhere the broken down above ground pool in the back,no paint left on the house and a set of stacked moonrakers on 60 foot towers at about 4 houses !!! Now that's living..right here in Dayton Ohio,just a couple of hours from WV or Ky ! |
Saddletramp025
| | Posted on Saturday, January 24, 2004 - 12:03 am: |
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Ok, check my profile pic and see if i'm a redneck LOL...Well at least it's not a Ford.. |
Mr_Rf
| | Posted on Saturday, January 24, 2004 - 2:35 am: |
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Ok, u want redneck...I'll show ya redneck.
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Karatebutcher
| | Posted on Saturday, January 24, 2004 - 7:59 am: |
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Saddletramp are those coon tails hanging from the back with a pair of Dice over the mirror?? |
Karatebutcher
| | Posted on Saturday, January 24, 2004 - 8:07 am: |
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Buck I really wonder who Porkrines is??
I wonder if old Porkrines wears longjons to the dinner table. |
Skilletlicker
| | Posted on Saturday, January 24, 2004 - 9:53 am: |
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when your mother in law leaves her spit can on the ironibg board |
Sparkomatic
| | Posted on Saturday, January 24, 2004 - 11:20 am: |
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A redneck is someone that brags about how good his pickup is but the truck always seems to be up on jackstands.
A redneck is someone that hates land developers and the suburban sprawl approaching his property/home but would be 1st one to sell his land to developers if given an offer.
A redneck loves Nascar racing but hates the Politically Correct nonsense that is getting to epidemic levels.
A redneck is someone that will always help a friend out and bail them out of jail from time to time. |
Ca346
| | Posted on Saturday, January 24, 2004 - 11:55 am: |
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WAIT! WAIT!
My next door neighbor has 4 dogs, two chickens, one horse, mows her lawn with a push mower (and the horse) and doesn't complain about my 50 foot antenna tower.... Does that qualify me?? |
Buck
| | Posted on Saturday, January 24, 2004 - 2:47 pm: |
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I gotta disagree there Spark....If he were a real friend he would be in jail with you I got a picture around here somewhere of me and a buddy on a turkey hunt...We were driving down the highway and saw a toilet that someone had lost out of there pickup...Well to make a long story short we both took turns getting pictures of each other doing good ol #2 right there on the side of the road in the toilet...This was a few years ago. Do that now and you will be begging Bruce to "throw me the keys" I guess I am a true redneck because I have more wildlife in my house than I do outside. Its all dead but it looks good on my wall
Buck |
Karatebutcher
| | Posted on Saturday, January 24, 2004 - 3:03 pm: |
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YES CA 346 You are now a REDNECK , just remember to get a bigger trash bag in the kitchen and you will only have to dump it once a week, |
Damyankee
| | Posted on Saturday, January 24, 2004 - 3:59 pm: |
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346,
Yes, that qualifies you...AS LUCKY!
Ron |
Karatebutcher
| | Posted on Saturday, January 24, 2004 - 6:35 pm: |
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Buck, you played DUMP TRUCK on a public Highway; you have mounted heads on all your walls,
Buck remember women are meant to be MOUNTED , but Buck not on the walls. Quiet looking at your wife in that strange Redneck way, placing her between the mounted Squirrel, and the Rabbit. |
Karatebutcher
| | Posted on Saturday, January 24, 2004 - 6:49 pm: |
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I just don"t know about these fancy Resturants anymore , I took my wife out to a fine dinner place last night, we sat down we waited for the waiter, he never came, one hour went by so I went up front and they asked me there what we wanted, well we got two of those fancy Happy Meals, and they brought them to us, well I decided to use the Facilities, well let it be known now I will never go back to that Fancy McDonalls place again, with there UNISEX FACILITIES, there must have been over thirteen woman come in there and I was enbarrased for about 2 hours in there. |
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